June 2011 Face of a Foster Care Graduate – Opal Morland

June 5, 2011

Dare to Dream
I am a graduate. Oh you may think that I am telling of high school or college but I am referring to my time as a foster youth seven to 10 years old. My time in the foster care system lasted about three years. I was afraid, ashamed, and never spoke about it to others. I didn’t want to hear whispers, be pitied, or tell others that my family was not functional.
I have decided to share my story because so many perceive foster kids as trouble with a capital T! Today, I am a successful wife, mom, grandmother and hula teacher. Hula teaching is my love and I share it to help bring awareness to needy kids and families.
I always wondered why God let this happen to me. I mean being a foster kid. Well I now believe I was given a gift and I have been in training my entire life so that I could help and inspire others. Not just foster youth but foster parents our community and anyone interested in helping kids. You see I have had a dream since seven years old to be a mom. I always knew that I would marry a wonderful man with dark hair and blue eyes; of course I didn’t know he would be bald now. I am just teasing because he is the first to laugh when I joke about him.
Our children include biological and foster/adopt children. I tell this because I want everyone to know that even though I did not conceive some of my children they are all our kids. We love them equally and I want society and most importantly our children themselves to know there is no shame in where they come from. As a parent I want them to be all that they can be and to follow their dreams. Most importantly, I want our children to respect and love who they are and what they can be. I want them to be able to share without fear of being condemned or ridiculed over something they had no control over.
I as a foster child was first afraid the day we were taken into custody. Nothing was explained to me and the fear of the unknown can make you go inside yourself. Next, I was fearful that kids in school would find out and I would not be accepted. But I was mostly fearful because I was the eldest of three siblings and I thought we were not going to be together. That is exactly what happened. When we were first taken into custody I didn’t know they put the boys in a separate area. I was going crazy not knowing where my little brother was and my sister was in a different section because of her young age. They did let my sister stay with me because she would not quit crying but I still did not know where our brother was. I finally found out recently, 40 years later, that he was having an adventure because he was with boys and not with his silly sisters!
Besides my family, one of my most proud accomplishments is my hula class. These are young men, women, kids and seniors helping to bring awareness to foster kids and families. Together we are a team helping others. It is such a joy for me to be able to teach my students the love of hula dance and love of others. I am so blessed with students who want to give back to our community. These past five years we have danced for cancer, abused children, the homeless shelter, made blankets for the Linus project, and brought joy to our seniors living in skilled living facilities. One of my most fond memories was sharing hula with young women held in custody at a Sheriffs detention center. We were very moved and proud that we could expose these young women to something they had never seen before. It was reported back to us that the Sheriffs detention center did not have any trouble with these young people for weeks after. I believe we only do what we know or have been shown to do. One of my own dancers told me after the performance that she was on the same path and that when she joined us it changed her life and lifestyle. I am very proud to have made a difference in her life.
Recently, my hula students came up with the idea to host a Summer Luau Event to raise funds for foster children. We are working together with our community to help make life a little better for foster kids, adopted kids, kinship families and groups that support needy kids and families. Our class is making a difference and I am very proud of how far we have come.
I guess I was inspired by God. I truly believe in the Almighty and trust that he has given me direction and that I am in the place I am supposed to be. While I was a foster child I felt abandoned but we were lucky to get a loving Christian foster family. I never really knew God until I went to church and got saved. I felt reborn and new. I was too young then to know His power but if you believe and trust with all your heart miracles can happen.
Sometimes terrible things happen to us in life. But we do not have to be consumed by them. Every one of us has the right to choose who we are and what we will become. We are not perfect and will make mistakes. The trick is to forgive ourselves and others so that we can move on. Life is not perfect but we can overcome all and be a better person. Let’s teach the world that a foster child is a gift and a graduate of unforeseen circumstances and that with the help, support and love of our community we can improve our lives and the lives of others. We are just people all shapes, ages, colors and sizes and each of us are unique with a special gift to offer.
I would like to end with a promise that you are in charge of who and what you become. Believe in yourself even when you think no one else does. Don’t be afraid to dream your dream no matter how big or small. Just go for it! We can be anything and we are only limited by our own imaginations…