Note From Founder: Jennifer Flamini – A Message from A Foster Dad
March 1, 2010
Jennifer Flamini
I received a wonderful letter from a foster dad. The letter offers both words of encouragement as well as a demonstration of human kindness that I am honored to witness and share with you. Thank you Bishop Hodges for your message of hope, love and faith in us.
My dear sister,
my name is Bishop H.L.Hodges, my wife and I have been foster parents for years. We first started in Los Angeles, Ca and upon moving back home, to Pensacola, Fl we cont. to do the same. My heart as always been for the children of the world, they struggle with life and it’s problems, while just looking for someone to tell them, “YOU CAN MAKE IT”! I was moved by your own personal story, and decide to write you about mine. Although i grew up in a home surrounded by two brothers and a sister, a mom that worked 16 hr. a day, I still did not have the much needed father figure, but l learned to become a man from a woman that showed me how to be one.
My wife and I have been married for 36 yr. although we never had any kids of our own, we “Adopted 6 kids that we use to foster”. they are all grown now, and have their own families, I still fuss, and I still LOVE THEM, just as much as I have always done. That the job of a “Father” not a dad, for any man can be a dad, but, there are few that can be counted and “Father’s”. If there was any one that I wished could have been my daughter, my wife and I wish it could have been you. I hope that all your efforts to help other’s, will be rewarded, for I can feel in my heart that you have a passion for what you are doing to help those that struggle, just as you have struggled!!!!!!
My wife and I are not as young as we use to be, L.O.L. I learned how to write that from my youngest girl, but, if we can encourge your group, and please tell them this one thing for us please, “NEVER, EVER, GIVE UP ON THEIR DREAMS”.
Thank you for letting a old man talk to you.
Bishop H.L.Hodges
Life Changing Ministries AFH Church
non-denomonational
Random Thoughts from Childhood Series – Oh What a Day
January 22, 2010
OH WHAT A DAY
Mat's Memories From Childhood
I really enjoyed the catholic school that I was placed into because the class size was much smaller than the public school and no one teased or picked on me. The trade off was that I had to wear a cheesy uniform of plaid shorts, white button up shirt and a clip on tie. There were variations of the uniform and I seemed to wear the wrong combination all too often. The other trade off was punishment by the head Nun should one step out of line. That punishment was a ruler to the palm of the hand and the number of times you where struck on the palm depended on the infraction. I had this punishment several times and OH how I hated that ruler!
I had a habit of spacing out and being completely oblivious to my surrounding. Maybe I had A.D.D., but whatever the case was I seemed to zone out at the most inappropriate time. I sat in the front row in class and this one time during lecture, I stood up as if I was the only one in the room and walked to the back of the room where the wall was lined with closets. I stepped inside the closet and closed the door partway and proceeded to go through the other student’s lunches. I ate someone’s Twinkie and took a bite out of someone else’s peanut butter sandwich. I suddenly hear a faint noise in the background and then snap out my trance. I hear the teacher yelling my name and telling me to remove myself from the closet and come to the front of the class immediately! All the other students just stared at me in silence as I walked to the front of the class. I was grabbed by the arm and escorted out of the class and down the hall to the head Nun. I was placed inside her office and spent a brief moment by myself as the teacher explained what happened to the Nun. I just knew I would be punished with the dreaded ruler. I started guessing in silence on how many times my palm would be hit, when suddenly the door opened and the Nun stood there with hands on her hip shaking her head. The door closed and she said nothing. She walked to her desk and opened a drawer and out came the RULER. I wanted to cry, but refused to let her see any tears. She grabbed my left hand and said I would be getting ten hits! I gasped and screamed TEN!
She would always count out loud, ONE TWO, THREE, after each strike. The first few always hurt the most and then the hand would become numb. The punishment began and as she reached THREE the most wonderful thing happened. I can’t believe it! It was the sweetest sight, pure nirvana! The ruler broke in two and I watched in slow motion as the broken piece flipped into the air and ricocheted off her desk and hit the ground. The hated ruler lost and I won! Figuring she had to be done, I went to turn and head for the door and she said, “Where are you going?” I stared in sheer horror as she opens another drawer and pulls out a new ruler. The terror did not stop there. The drawer was full of dozens of rulers! Oh crap! The really sad part was that I actually thought that was the only ruler and not once considered the existence of others. Sad I know! She finishes NINE, TEN, and then I’m told to return to class.
I get back just in time for confession. This is my first confession and I have no idea what to expect. We walk single file to the chapel and enter in groups of five. I’m in the second group that enters and we watch as each person walks into a small closet and closes the door. I faintly hear each one start with “Forgive me father for I have sinned” followed by something they did wrong. My heart starts to race and I begin to panic. It’s my turn and my legs feel like lead as I enter and close the door. I hear the priest say “Yes son” and I stand there in silence. My head is spinning and I’m trying to think of something bad I did, but draw a blank. Suddenly, I know what to say and I begin with “Forgive me father for I have sinned” and I hear “Go ahead.” I make something up and say “I stole a lollipop from my brother.” I’m told to do two Hail Mary’s and then I exit the room. Will this day ever end? I just want to go home to Ivy House.
The irony of the confession was that I lied, which was a sin. So I committed a sin to tell a sin and completely forgot about the sin I just committed early in the day by stealing someone’s lunch. I really have a knack of making my life harder than it needs to be but hey, I’m a kid and there’s plenty of time to correct that……………
Foster Care Statistics Poll Commissioned by CASA
August 13, 2009
Interesting results from recent poll on foster care. Thanks to Lin at childrenwithoutavoiceusa.org for sending our way!
A national online Harris Poll commissioned by the National Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) Association found that most adults know little about foster care or the experience of children in care. The poll was conducted in December 2008 and gathered data from 2,281 adults about their impressions of the foster care system and its impact on children. Results were weighted to reflect the whole U.S. population. Key findings indicate the following:
83% of adults knew very little about the experience of children in care.
31% knew someone who was or had been in foster care.
45% reported negative impressions of foster care, and 11 percent reported positive impressions (the remainder were neutral or did not have enough information to decide).
11% thought that children were in foster care because of something the children did, although the majority strongly disagreed and tended to blame the biological parents.
87% agreed that improving the foster care system should be a national priority.
In a press release about the poll’s findings, the National CASA Association contrasted the poll results with a focus group study conducted earlier in the year with 50 youth currently or formerly in foster care. These youth present a different picture, with many of the youth developing into determined individuals, optimistic about their future. They felt that the difficulties they had faced had made them stronger. Many cited disruptions in schooling and problems finding resources after leaving foster care as major obstacles; however, they noted that the support of a significant adult—like a CASA volunteer—can help them overcome some of these challenges. For more information, visit www.casanet.org.
Children’s Rights-National Watchdog Organization Advocating on Behalf of Abused and Neglected Children
July 13, 2009
- Children’s Rights-Mission
2009-04-01_spring_newsletter_final
Great Foster Care site in Australia
June 22, 2009
I met a great woman from Australia who publishes a site that focuses on foster care , sharing viewpoints of the foster parents. We found each other on Twitter and I like hearing the perspective of some positive and loving parents who cherish their foster child. Follow link below, check it out and let me know what you think. I invited the site creators to submit articles for posting on this site so our audience can gain insight from another side.
Technical Issues Resolved
June 7, 2009
Today our site experienced some technical difficulties which caused us to be off line for 1-2 hours. Please note that we have resolved those issues, thanks to the assistance of the talented Dave Holowiski, our favorite Word Press Guru! As many of you know, Word Press is our favorite blogging software. Experienced professionals like Dave really help this software stand out among the blogging options out there! Follow link to visit his site: http://www.teachmewp.com
Serving up Some Inspiration-What Makes the Difference-?
June 4, 2009
Why is it that some who fall down cannot get up while others are slammed repeatedly and refuse to stay down? I think we all know that person who barely survives a scapped knee, complaining to anyone that will listen and ranting about how terrible life is for them? Please tell me I am not the only person dealing with a “sissy la la” type personality! Then you have people like those featured on this site and wonder what makes the difference. The next time you come accross someone who is focussed on a non deserving pity party…hum, I say please direct them to this site for a little dose of humility and reality.
Traffic is climbing
June 1, 2009
Good news, May traffic numbers are the highest yet, no doubt a result of the fabulous Foster Care Alumni sharing their stories!
May 2009 Results:
Page views total = 4595
Visits total = 942
Hits total = 13,282
That’s pretty impressive for a site built for an audience that has a reputation for keeping silent don’t you think? Also worth mentioning is that we are seeing traffic/visits from near and far and here are a few locations:
United States
Canada
Czech Republic
India
Australia
This site, not unlike “The Little Engine that Could” will continue striving to bring Silent Warriors into the light of society.
New Resource Page
June 1, 2009
A new page with helpful links to some great websites is now up on http://www.fostercareinamerica.com. The new “Resource Links” page is located in the “About” section of the website. The new resource page can be visited by following this link
Hope For Orphans and Abused Children:
Help Prevent Child Abuse:
Finding Forever Families for Children in Foster Care:
National Foster Care Coalition:
Everyone Deserves a Family:
Promotion of permanency, community, and caring relationships for adoptive families of foster children while offering safety and meaningful purpose in the daily lives of older adults:
The National Network for Young People in Foster Care:
I was asked why don’t they speak out and tell their stories
May 14, 2009
Recently the question was posed as to why, if there are 12 million adults in America who spent time in the foster care system, why don’t they share their stories with the public? My response: “I don’t know that anybody has asked them!”
Silent Warriors
May 3, 2009
We all have our battles to fight. Some are private, some are public and some are too painful to discuss. This website, this cause is about the more than 12 million adults living in America who have spent time in the foster care system. You may not recognize us, raised to keep silent, you might not realize we are here. We are your neighbor, your boss, your wife, husband, the person who delivers your mail, your child’s soccer coach, your child’s teacher, we are silently walking among you. For more than 2 years, I have monitored all things (online blogs and news feeds) relating to foster care; the system, the childen, and the failures. Today, this site, aims to feature these amazing survivors, who I have come to call silent warriors. They talk with me, share with me and open their hearts to me. I am grateful, and I am humbled. These warriors, over 12 million of them out there in America are truly inspirational. Please continue to follow this site and be inspired by reading their stories!
Well appreciated praise!
April 29, 2009
This writing was sent to me by a former foster care alumni. I feel so honored to have received it that I wanted to share it. Thanks to John, the Author for sending!
New Path
| 26 April 2009
The path that I have had to traverse may have been a very difficult road to travel, but when you decide to follow it the road will not be so treacherous. C.J. MacKechnie The inspiration came from thinking about you and what you are doing on www.fostercareinamerica.com. That is so much what you are doing. While the whole world seems to focus on those bad and criminal foster kids and here is the stats to prove it. You are starting something positive. You are starting something even though small like a mustard seed. Will grow into something. What it will be only you can see within your own mind. |
Follow me on Twitter!
March 17, 2009
I’m on Twitter now so please be sure and sign up and follow me. Send me your Twitter link and I’ll follow you too! How much fun is it to always know what each other are doing:)
Here is my Twitter link: http://www.twitter.com/jcflamini
Best Wishes,
JC (Jennifer) Flamini
The Face of a Foster Care Graduate
www.fostercareinamerica.com
Foster Care in America Joins Facebook
October 27, 2008
Now visit us on Facebook: “fostercareinamerica”
fostercareinamerica.com now on Facebook!
Foster Care in America Joins Myspace
October 27, 2008
Fostercareinamerica.com now on Myspace!
